Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Hiking Up Memory Lane

Tonight while searching for my college transcripts, I took an exhausting hike up memory lane.  Yes, "hike up," because whoever penned "walk down memory lane" was clearly delusional.  Sure, I found some marbles along the path, but there were also a lot of rocks, and mud, and unidentifiable sludge slides.  It is definitely travel not meant for the weak and weary.  In the end, though, it was a lot like participating in boot camp at the gym...with every station you think you might just die.  You hate it, you want to kill the trainers, you question "why?" repeatedly.  And then suddenly...you're done.  You made it.  And despite all the horror that you felt while going through it, you feel happy.  Because, well, you're a survivor.

I found a lot of my old poetry and thought I'd share a couple.  I'll spare you the deep, dark, scary stuff of my previously tortured self, and share just two that are not great but also not going to get me committed (cough, cough). Despite how frightening it can be to read into your past soul, it's also very enlightening.  I can't post any of the photos I found because my life has been threatened by several people (including myself) if I do.  So, here ya go...a couple of old poems (written exactly as I wrote them):

"change of address"
to whom it may concern:

i am writing to inform you of my not-so-recent
change of address.
it seems you have lost track of me,
much to my dismay,
and i would like to correct this situation
as soon as possible.

as with other 
unseen
magical
extraordinary
beings such as yourself
(i.e., santa, the tooth fairy, the easter bunny, and those little sock-stealing elves)
i thought my move would be automatically registered in your system.
after all, santa never lost me,
and we moved all over the damn place.

however, since you seem to be working off of
some antiquated tracking system,
i would like to manually provide you
with my current whereabouts
(please see the address at the top of the page).

i sincerely hope that you will see to 
correcting this situation
as soon as possible
as i am without hope
or inspiration
or any such thing
and have been since my relocation.

please consider this an emergency
and send my muse to me
at the correct location
as soon as possible.

yours in considerable distress,
a former writer extraordinaire
~~~

"Caterpillar"
There are so many reasons 
to turn around
and only a few 
to step forward

I am safe here
in this cocoon
but it's been too long now
and metamorphosis
has not occurred

Maybe I'm just not meant to be
a butterfly

So be it

Caterpillars cannot fly
but they can crawl anywhere.
~~~

And there you have it.  Some selfies I took along the hike up.

~peace

p.s.  a note after the post...there were a lot of shiny marbles, and I'm happy to have the memories I do.  They made me the phenomenal person I am today!